It is for freedom He set us free

Galatians 5
vs 1. For freedom Christ has set us free, stand firm therefore, and don't submit again to the yoke of slavery.
13. For you were called to freedom, brothers.
16. But I say, walk by the Spirit and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.

In the card Steve gave me at DTS graduation he included Galatians 5:1 and talked about how he felt that God was saying thta freedom in an area that God has blessed me in and I exemplify freedom (after writing this I went home and found the card and his exact words were: One of the great things God has put in you is freedom. This is not to say you will always feel that way, but it is in you more than most.) I found it very interesting because I don't feel free most of the time. I feel bound in insecurity and lies. I feel bound and enslaved to the fear of man and to sin.
I was struck by verse 16. We are constantly asking how to be free from sin and the answer is found here: walk by the Spirit and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. That is what most sin is, especially sexual sin: a gratification of the desires of the flesh. Verse 17 says, "for the desired of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh."
But how does one "walk by the Spirit'? When I think of this I am reminded of Ephesians and the "five walks" in chapters 4 and 5. "Walk in a manner worthy of the calling", "walk in truth", "walk in love", "walk as children of light", and "walk as wise."
I don't know if this is the best theological answer to the question of how to walk in the Spirit, but it's a good place to start, I suppose. So, in light of the topic of walking in the Spirit so as not to gratify desires of the flesh, what do each of these look like and why might they help? 

A Journey Like No Other

I am a traveler. I feel the most content when I am moving around from place to place, always  busy, always something new. I begin to feel restless if I'm in one place for too long and the restlessness, if not dealt with, will turn into an urgency, a driving need to do somthing different, to explore new streets and alley ways. A desperate desire to meet new people and hear new stories.

What a Crazy Life!

These past weeks few weeks have been nothing short of eventful! I would love to tell you the long story, but for the sake of time (mine and yours) I'm simply going to share with you all the changes that have happened and where this is taking me.

Tomorrow at 12:45 pm I will leave Kona Hawaii and fly to Honolulu. I will be there for four days, spending time with my aunt and uncle, resting, relaxing and being spoiled (oh how I'm looking forward to that)! :)  When I leave  Honolulu I will head to Great Falls, MT aka Home. I will be spending close to a week in MT. One crazy, busy, hectic week full of family, friends, coffee and general merry-making.

Hawaii Sun and random musings

I find myself being struck with the face that I actually LIVE in Hawaii at random, odd moments. This morning I was sitting a low rock wall, drinking coffee and looking at the ocean with sweat running down my back (at 10 in the morning!!!!) and it just hit me. This thought that surfaces every once in a while. "I can believe I actually live here." For me, though, unlike most people I know here, it's not a though that brings with it the crazy feelings of  "Wow! I can't believe I live in this paradise where people with lots of money honey-moon and vacation," but rather, "Wow, I can't believe that I live in this foreign place where summer never ends and people I've never understood or related to dream of living."

Transitions

The past three months I have been in Kona Hawaii taking the Church Pioneering School at Youth With a Mission's University of the Nations. It's been challenging, affirming and just all around wonderful. Now it has come to a close. Classes are over and my classmates will all be leaving in the next week to various locations around the world.

I had planned on going to the Philippines with a few of my classmates and staff to put into practice everything we've been learning and then go from there but as often happens, God had other plans for me. After lots of prayer and counsel, I have decided to stay here in Kona staffing in the coffee shop on campus. This was not at all what I planned or thought of when I came out here. To be perfectly honest, I don't like Hawaii that much. It would be great to vacation here, but living here is not so great, especially for a Montana girl who loves seasons and mountains and long road trips. But, I am going to be obedient and stay here for as long as God calls me.

Play List

Thought it would be fun to include my wonderful playlist of beautiful music I was listening to while writing my previous two blogs. Hope you enjoy! :)

Wounds that Heal Part 2

I sank to the floor and I said, "I trust You. I'm scared but I trust you." Thankfully, God is amazingly good and He only shows us what we need to know. He did not, like I feared, show me that abuse. Instead, I heard a voice. I heard it as clearly as though I was remember a conversation from yesterday. It was the voice of an unfamiliar man, but I knew who it was. He said to me, "Your mommy and daddy gave me permission to do this to you. They brought here and told me I could do this because you haven't been a good girl." I heard those sentences I completely lost it. I was sitting on the floor sobbing for almost an hour. Huge, heaving wailing sobs with snot running down my face and my shirt becoming drenched in tears. 

Wounds that Heal Part 1

Memories are interesting things, often taking on their own life, their own personality. They decide when they want to be remembered and forgotten, sometimes they lie, other times they tell the brutal, honest truth. There are memories that bring you joy, memories that bring nostalgia and a tinge of sadness, and memories that bring you nothing but pain.

And there are those that hide.

The One Thing

Tuesday afternoon I was informed by my school leaders that I need to have the remainder of my fees for lecture phase in by Friday. I still need $1700 and was praying about what God wanted me to do. Tuesday night I felt led to fast until Friday evening.

Since then I have been spending a lot of time in the prayer room. I have been soaking myself in the Word and really seeking God's heart for me during this time. Yesterday during my dinner-time prayer, God told me to read Song of Solomon. As I was reading that God gave a wonderful revelation of what His heart is for me in this.

As Vulnerable as Possible

These past weeks have been quite interesting for me. In addition to everything God has been speaking to me through our speakers in class, He's also been speaking a lot to me that doesn't really have much to do with I'm learning in class.

It all started with Peter Xu. In my last post I wrote about the shadow of the cross. In there, I said that I wasn't sure yet what my cross looked like. In the weeks since I wrote that, I've been learning a lot more about what that looks like for me right now.

When I was doing some research on the process and history of crucifixion for my previous post (yes, I did research on it, I wasn't just making stuff up off the top of my head!) I came across something that didn't really stand out to me at the time, but came to my mind the next day. And the day after that. And the day after that.

The Shadow of the Cross in on My Heart

 “Take up your cross daily and follow me.” Eight words spoken over 2,000 years ago that still ring in the hearts and ears of many. What do they mean? 2,000 years ago the people who heard these words would have immediately understood their meaning because they had intimate knowledge of what the cross was. Today it is not so. Today we have a very limited framework for the understanding of the meaning of the cross. We know that Jesus died on a cross. We know that upon it was bought our freedom, but when it comes to an actual understanding of the physical cross itself, our frame of reference comes mainly from art work and jewelry. How do we get back to the original meaning and apply this to our lives?

Further and up and further in

Lately I've been wondering if anyone actually reads this blog and if it's even worth it for me to continue to update it and pour my heart and my thoughts out here. I have decided that my "readership" is not the point. I didn't start this blog to garner fans. I started it to have a place to write and to try and keep people updated on what's going on with my life. I will continue to keep this blog updated regardless of whether or not anyone reads it. That being said, here we go :)

I've been in Kona Hawaii for 3 weeks now. It's so strange that three weeks has gone by already! I am here doing a their Church Pioneering School. The intent of this school is equip and train us to be able to go back to wherever it is that God is calling us and start up new churches. When we say new churches, though, we're not talking about new services and new buildings. We're talking about new gatherings of believers living life together.

Why You Should Support Me (or any other missionary/missionary-in-training)

These past few days I've been thinking about what I'm doing and how much it takes to make this possible for me. I was also thinking about missions in general, the great financial cost involved, and the tremendous lack of support. As I was thinking about these things, I began to think that maybe the biggest reason why people like myself (when I say that I am meaning anyone who is involved in missions in such a capacity that they CANNOT work a paid job to provide for their EVERYDAY needs and expenses) lack financial support is simply because there is a lack of information.

I am not writing this note to ask you for money. I am simply writing this to inform you of what I am doing, what the GLOBAL need is (not financially, but spiritually) and how you can make a difference.